Making Friends

“I don’t have any friends? No one wants to play with me!”  When a parent hears this it can tear at your heart strings and make you feel so helpless.  You can’t force the other kids to play with your child, can you?  Of course not!  But here are some things that I have discovered recently that have actually helped.

1.  Rejection is often a two way street.  Ask your child if it’s really that no one wants to play with him/her or is it the other way round– that he/she has decided he doesn’t want to play with them.  Boys generally fall into two categories—sports or science-minded.  If a boy  is science minded and looks around and sees only sports kids, then he will often retreat into his own world and shun the rest.  Give him some assurance that there are other kids more like him out there but he has to go and find them.  They may be hiding out too.   Same with girls—a girl might look around and see girls who seem to be only interested in more “mature things” while your girl still wants to play with dolls.
2. If there really are only sports-minded kids around or girls who are growing up too quickly, then it might be better if your child decides to bend a little and do what others are doing for a bit and then try to convince the others, or at least one other to do something that your child is more interested in—give a little to get a little.   
3. A good way to get other kids interested in you is to get involved in some interesting activity that lures others to you.  A young boy around 8 did just this.  He made some paper airplanes and brought them to school, setting up shop during recess.  Within a few minutes he had one interested party hanging around him and before long there was a crowd.  He was lonely no more.